Love and connection are paradoxical these days. Despite our ability to connect quickly through technology and how often we can connect, sincerity has become almost impossible to achieve for many.
We are living in an age of excess—too many options, platforms, and possibilities—yet we face limited resources when it comes to one of the most important forms of currency: effort.
In this world of performative disconnection and algorithmically derived love, Shalant Dating emerged as a rebellion against emotional deprivation by promoting visible effort in adult relationships.
Shalant Dating rejects the increasingly dominant nonchalant approach to dating. Rather than rewarding delayed responses from one another (e.g., a lack of caring), Shalant Dating promotes visible acts of caring through intentional activities, remembering shared memories, sending voice notes with emotion, and providing an emotional boost while maintaining ongoing communication. In short, Shalant Dating gives dignity back to our intentions.
The evidence of change associated with Shalant Dating is not simply anecdotal; it is also supported by statistics, with many of these changes occurring globally.
According to Pew Research, nearly 50% of adults aged 30 and under reported finding dating significantly more difficult than 10 years ago.
They cite mixed messages and uncertainty in their dating experiences. Additionally, Match Group’s annual research shows over 70% of persons born between 1980-2000 prefer emotional conversations and effective communication over superficial attraction(s).
Overall, dating fatigue is increasing worldwide. In the United States alone, approximately 60 million persons active utilize dating applications. Globally, there are over 378 million persons that use online dating services.
Further, the value of the global online dating industry is projected to exceed USD 13 billion by 2030. Despite increased means of connecting, sociologists have provided no evidence of increased emotional depth associated with or resulting from electronic dating methods.
This may be due to what some social scientists call 'choice overload.' When there are so many options, individuals are less motivated to commit to a specific choice, resulting in greater emotional expenditure.
As such, one finds oneself without a purpose for making a substantial emotional contribution, since one can choose from an unlimited number of options on the same display screen.
This choice overload phenomenon has created an overwhelming cultural movement, both locally and globally, as evidenced by the establishment of secure attachment behavior—defined as clear communication, emotion(s), and keeping promises as evidence of being dedicated—amongst younger generations throughout major cities (e.g., New York City to Tokyo or London to Mumbai).
With cultural changes, the image of the romantic ideal has shifted from a notion of mystery to one of two people mindful of each other.
Dissenters to the Shalant Dating philosophy view physical effort as unnecessary and possibly desperate. Most criticism reflects a timeless social construct that defines distance and seemingly unemotional expression as desirable in dating.
In actuality, healthy relationships require foundational elements such as reciprocity, vulnerability, and mutual investment. Therefore, physical expressions arising from emotion-based interactions foster passion and intimacy.
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